thoughts of a thinker

“Cogito, ergo sum (I think, therefore I am).” –Rene Descartes

Archive for February, 2007

something to think about and a song

“You must never feel badly about making mistakes,” explained Reason quietly, “as long as you take the trouble to learn from them. For you often learn more by being wrong for the right reasons than you do by being right for the wrong reasons.”
–Norton Juster, The Phantom Tollbooth

If You’re Not the One

(David Beddingfield) 

If you’re not the one 
Then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you’re not the one 
Then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine 
Then why does your heart return my call
If you are not mine 
Would I have the strength to stand at all
 
I never know what the future brings 
But I know you are here with me now
We’ll make it through 
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
 
I don’t want to run away 
But I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
 
If I don’t need you 
Then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don’t need you 
Then why does your name resound in my head?
If you’re not for me 
Then why does this distance maim my life?
If you’re not for me 
Then why do I dream of you as my wife?
 
I don’t know why you’re so far away 
But I know that this much is true
We’ll make it through 
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray in you’re the one I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life
 
I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it
I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you
Then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
 
Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong
That it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart
And pray for the strength to stand today
Cause I love you, whether it’s wrong or right
And though I can’t be with you tonight
And know my heart is by your side
  
I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it
I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you
Then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I could stay in your arms

more quotes

When people keep telling you that you can’t do a thing, you kind of like to try it.

Margaret Chase Smith

Hell yeah! How you’d like to prove them all wrong and have the last laugh!

It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.

William Blake

(Or people you thought were your friends!)

positive and negative

What is a weed? A plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

 What is an asshole? A person whose virtues have been flushed down the drain.

-Me

 

on leaving

i’ve left my other job, the one i really loved. but this is not to say that i am not loving the job that i have now. i am enjoying every second of it, and i could even say that it is more challenging than the one i’ve left. but i would have stayed on with being a copyeditor, if only for the love of the task; however, i am not a slab of stone nor a marble statue that has no feelings and pride. i am no inanimate object, and i cannot will myself to become so detached and unfeeling of all the negativity that surrounds me in that former hell hole. i cannot turn a deaf ear or a blind eye and continue to live and breathe the same air with the very people whom I find despicable: the world has become to small for all of us, and just to have my own space, my freedom, and my happiness back, i am willing to leave and turn my back on a more lucrative job that has given me quite a comfortable life for the past 17 months.

some people do not understand. i know that most of them must think how foolish i have been to leave and leap into something that would only pay me half. but there’s more to my life than just 5 digits per month. i have my pride to keep and my principles to uphold. i do not want to be with people i no longer believe in; and just to keep the peace i have to get myself out of the warzone, lest i start to drop nuclear bombs that might kill even the “innocent civilians.”

though i was angry, i felt sad when i left. leaving the people, the genuine people, with whom i have spent more than a year with was hard. i have learned to love them and they have become a part of my life. leaving the job that i’ve always wanted, the job that i loved, the job i felt i was born to do was heartbreaking. now i’ll miss pressing Alt Q, running my macros, reading about things i never thought people paid attention to…the perks of the job itself are countless. and of course, this means that i would have to live with half of what i used to have. that perhaps is the toughest.

nevertheless, i am happy. i do not regret leaving. i am even happy that the sad and bitter things that happened late last year happened; at least i know now who i can trust. i found out who genuinely cares for me. though some doors slammed shut on my face, a lot of windows openned up for me and i was able to see beyond the cold confines of that stone castle.

i have a lot more sacrifices to make, a lot of adjustments to do, a lot more things to master.  but i  can wait  when all these efforts will finally pay off. i know that one day, they will.

leaving may be sad; but if you do not go, you’ll never know what lies ahead.